Lee Marvin won an Oscar in the 1965 western spoof “Cat Ballou” playing Kid Sheleen, who sported a steel prosthetic nose that could sniff out a nearby saloon.

Jackson Two-Bears: “He's a murderer, a hired killer. His nose was bit off in a fight. “

Frankie Ballou: “If I was gonna be scared, I'd be scared of the fella who bit it off, not him!”

Apparently our favorite governmental agency is seeking to resurrect the idea.  DHS is looking to the scientific community to devise a bionic nose - airport scanners that will sniff out “deceptive individuals”.

What? Yes.

We are led to believe human scent-prints change according to mood, and are as unique as fingerprints. MIT researchers have already produced a gel that acts like the smell receptors in the human nose, and are trying next to isolate the tangy smell of stress-related adrenaline so that nervous passengers or those with a guilty conscience can be singled out.

Homeland Security officials said they are only exploring the possibilities but some scientists predict it’s only a matter of time before a “smell bank” from crime scenes, like DNA, could be used in court.  One university academic says chemists can already identify human smells by race, age, and environment. Scientists will be able to tell police whether a thief is white, black, or Asian; whether they are a teenager or older, or are depressed.

One problem (among many) is that many best-selling perfumes have complex molecules that mask natural smells and confuse detector dogs. Natural scents are also boosted by stress, which releases hormones from armpits and hands. The odor can then spread in 20-foot clouds to cling to clothes, furniture, and walls (and about 35 passengers surrounding you in the waiting area).